do opposites really attract?

for some odd reason the topic of compatibility and relationships keep being brought up in a number of conversations i've been a part of lately. i've had a bevy of conversations with friends that consist of questions like: "do you think opposites really attract?", "do you have a tendency to like people who are more like you?", so on and so forth. you get the point.

i think the reason why i even have an inkling of interest in this topic may have to do with the fact that lately, i feel i'm ready for something different. something that isn't something akin to one of my many platonic relationships. i've been having these terrible cravings to connect with someone, anyone (well, not ANYONE), and i honestly believe these are all very important questions to consider before you get to that pivotal moment when you say, " hey baby, let's get it on." hah! i kid! i kid! i would never call anyone "baby"!

anyway ...

back to the topic at hand.

i honestly believe that people, companions, friends, etc. who are completely different from each other can have something beautiful together. i think one's personality isn't necessarily the defining factor of whether a relationship works or not. i like to believe that just as long as two beings have similar interests, hobbies, and really make the effort to accommodate the other's needs, they could be perfect for each other. (i keep saying "beings" because i'm totally referring to my current lover, my dog.)

wow. did that statement just make me sound like some naive hopeless romantic? i'm sorry. how uncharacteristic of me.

but yes, i honestly believe it. a prime example is my friend, we'll call him boy. boy happens to be a very old and very good friend of mine. the reason we're such good friends? we are essentially the same person except that i am sans penis. we both are incapable of holding a phone conversation for longer than is necessary. talk on the phone for hours about how your day was? pft! yea right! that's just pure madness! we both have the tendency to practice very little tact when it comes to other's feelings. we both don't seem to really understand the social norms of communication. we're both basically fairly independent people that do as we want, when we want, without really taking others into consideration. well, at least that's how he used to be.

now a little background information on his girlfriend, we'll call her girl. girl happens to be the complete opposite. she's your typical female. she likes to ring him up regularly to see how his day was. she likes to call him a million times in a row if he doesn't pick up the phone right away. she wants to know what he did all day. she likes to see him whenever she can. she is, easily put, emotionally dependent. i'm not saying that's a bad thing. i'm just stating the facts. girl and boy couldn't have started out more different.

i had lunch with them the other day and we got to talking. how do you guys make your relationship work? how does her "neediness" not get on your nerves? how does his inability to talk on the phone and be there whenever you need him not piss you off? after all was said and done, it was quite simple. compromise. typical, i know. but it's what works. after over a year of dating, they have become better people because of each other. boy is now a much more understanding, social person. boy takes into account other people's feelings and needs before his own. boy is on his way to becoming a real human being. girl has also changed for the better. girl has become less needy and demanding. girl has chilled down quite a bit. girl doesn't call 10 times in a row if the boy doesn't pick up the phone right away. girl waits for him to call her back. she now knows he eventually will. easy as that.

what is the point of this long ass story that i'm sure you stopped reading 30 lines ago?

well, let me tell you my kiddies.

it all goes back to proving my statement that no matter how different two people's personalities are, it doesn't matter. if you're willing to put in the time and effort to accommodate the other person and to meet somewhere in the middle, anything can work. also, you may walk away becoming a better person having done so. obviously (in my opinion), having something in common that can become a topic of conversation is also a necessary factor in sustaining a viable relationship, but that seems to be a no-brainer.

basically, i walked away from this conversation with the boy telling me i'm just like him. we need to date someone who's not exactly like us. i need someone like girl. someone who will keep me accountable. someone who will pick up the phone and call me regularly and make me make the effort to see them. someone who is just a little bit "needy". someone who is so unlike myself that it's almost painful in the beginning. this could be my saving grace. obviously, this isn't going to be the game changer when it comes to my issues in the relationship department. however, this post is getting way too long and delving into that would take at least 3 more pages. my problematic love-life is a topic that can addressed at another time. trust me. i won't be rid of these problems anytime soon. after all, as you all know, i am the queen supreme of the friend-zone.

did that post even make sense? did i even address the topic? i don't know what just happened. whatever. doesn't matter. in the end, it's just me thinking out loud. who really cares if it makes any sense to anyone else.