don't judge a book by it's cover

this weekend was a much-needed reminder that one's personality, truly, is what's important.

@wookymonster to @khongster

"Can't sleep. Read your blog. We need to find you some real world problems."

chocolate gooey butter cookies

ash requested i post a picture of cookies. i went one step further and posted the recipe as well. you're welcome. i used to make these cookies all the time in college when i wanted to avoid doing actual work. they're on my list of top 10 favorite cookies of all time. like everything worthwhile in life, they take a little time. however, they're incredibly easy to make. do it. make them. you won't regret it.

chocolate gooey butter cookies

p.s. you can totally rework the recipe and use lemon cake batter and lemon extract to make the perfect lemon gooey butter cookies. they're perfection. i promise.

do opposites really attract?

for some odd reason the topic of compatibility and relationships keep being brought up in a number of conversations i've been a part of lately. i've had a bevy of conversations with friends that consist of questions like: "do you think opposites really attract?", "do you have a tendency to like people who are more like you?", so on and so forth. you get the point.

i think the reason why i even have an inkling of interest in this topic may have to do with the fact that lately, i feel i'm ready for something different. something that isn't something akin to one of my many platonic relationships. i've been having these terrible cravings to connect with someone, anyone (well, not ANYONE), and i honestly believe these are all very important questions to consider before you get to that pivotal moment when you say, " hey baby, let's get it on." hah! i kid! i kid! i would never call anyone "baby"!

anyway ...

back to the topic at hand.

i honestly believe that people, companions, friends, etc. who are completely different from each other can have something beautiful together. i think one's personality isn't necessarily the defining factor of whether a relationship works or not. i like to believe that just as long as two beings have similar interests, hobbies, and really make the effort to accommodate the other's needs, they could be perfect for each other. (i keep saying "beings" because i'm totally referring to my current lover, my dog.)

wow. did that statement just make me sound like some naive hopeless romantic? i'm sorry. how uncharacteristic of me.

but yes, i honestly believe it. a prime example is my friend, we'll call him boy. boy happens to be a very old and very good friend of mine. the reason we're such good friends? we are essentially the same person except that i am sans penis. we both are incapable of holding a phone conversation for longer than is necessary. talk on the phone for hours about how your day was? pft! yea right! that's just pure madness! we both have the tendency to practice very little tact when it comes to other's feelings. we both don't seem to really understand the social norms of communication. we're both basically fairly independent people that do as we want, when we want, without really taking others into consideration. well, at least that's how he used to be.

now a little background information on his girlfriend, we'll call her girl. girl happens to be the complete opposite. she's your typical female. she likes to ring him up regularly to see how his day was. she likes to call him a million times in a row if he doesn't pick up the phone right away. she wants to know what he did all day. she likes to see him whenever she can. she is, easily put, emotionally dependent. i'm not saying that's a bad thing. i'm just stating the facts. girl and boy couldn't have started out more different.

i had lunch with them the other day and we got to talking. how do you guys make your relationship work? how does her "neediness" not get on your nerves? how does his inability to talk on the phone and be there whenever you need him not piss you off? after all was said and done, it was quite simple. compromise. typical, i know. but it's what works. after over a year of dating, they have become better people because of each other. boy is now a much more understanding, social person. boy takes into account other people's feelings and needs before his own. boy is on his way to becoming a real human being. girl has also changed for the better. girl has become less needy and demanding. girl has chilled down quite a bit. girl doesn't call 10 times in a row if the boy doesn't pick up the phone right away. girl waits for him to call her back. she now knows he eventually will. easy as that.

what is the point of this long ass story that i'm sure you stopped reading 30 lines ago?

well, let me tell you my kiddies.

it all goes back to proving my statement that no matter how different two people's personalities are, it doesn't matter. if you're willing to put in the time and effort to accommodate the other person and to meet somewhere in the middle, anything can work. also, you may walk away becoming a better person having done so. obviously (in my opinion), having something in common that can become a topic of conversation is also a necessary factor in sustaining a viable relationship, but that seems to be a no-brainer.

basically, i walked away from this conversation with the boy telling me i'm just like him. we need to date someone who's not exactly like us. i need someone like girl. someone who will keep me accountable. someone who will pick up the phone and call me regularly and make me make the effort to see them. someone who is just a little bit "needy". someone who is so unlike myself that it's almost painful in the beginning. this could be my saving grace. obviously, this isn't going to be the game changer when it comes to my issues in the relationship department. however, this post is getting way too long and delving into that would take at least 3 more pages. my problematic love-life is a topic that can addressed at another time. trust me. i won't be rid of these problems anytime soon. after all, as you all know, i am the queen supreme of the friend-zone.

did that post even make sense? did i even address the topic? i don't know what just happened. whatever. doesn't matter. in the end, it's just me thinking out loud. who really cares if it makes any sense to anyone else.

woody allen, the new shelton wet/dry

"Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions."

borrowed from robert's tumblr

blindness

blindness by jose saramago

so good. go read now.

august

it's august already! oh, how time flies! i can't believe summer is already more than half-way over. i can't wait till fall. fall weather in korea is perfection. summer, not so much. well, since we still have a couple months till it starts cooling down a bit here ...

things to look foward to in august:

shin's visit ...

christine's visit ...

doug and irene's visit ...

and of course, my big move north of the river in a couple weeks! it's crazy. NORTH of the river! changes are a-brewin'!

i always love when it when old friends come visit seoul (and me!). after all, if i can't go back to see everyone, the next best option is having everyone come here to see me!

it's going to be a good month. i can feel it in my bones.